Do you remember being 14, awkward in every part of your life, not popular, and being completely obsessed with a movie star or singer in a way that you were absolutely sure it was true love? Who was it? Mine was Billy Wirth. He was captivating in War Party, he was a super hot vampire in The Lost Boys, and among his plethora of other works, he threw me into womanhood with Red Shoe Diaries.
I received a message that he was going to be in town, and even as a 3o something mother of five – I swear I squealed out loud. I called my husband, I texted the nanny, I mentally ruled out every outfit in my closet. The entire week before, I worried that he was going to be a jerk and totally ruin the image that a teenage girl had built of the perfect man. I don’t know why I still felt so strongly about validating that inner teen. In my time since then, I’m no longer awkward (usually), editors pay me to write words for them, my children are amazing, I know what real true love is and I married the real deal perfect for me man. But still, BILLY WIRTH.
The day came. Dave & I drove downtown. We walked into the bar where Billy and his friend Brooke McCarter were going to be. It was like I had never been in a bar before. Should we sit? Should we order a drink and wait? Should I just start screaming his name? I noticed Dave looking behind me and turned around. There he was – in a back room just sitting in a chair like being in the same place and breathing the same air as me was a natural thing. He looked up at me, smiled, stood, and walked over to me. He said “Hi, I’m Billy” and with all the elegance I had, I said “Oh my God”.
Thankfully I regained my sanity fairly quickly and introduced myself and Dave. And then – and THEN – we chatted! As if that were a normal, everyday, not life altering thing to do. Like we’ve talked several times before. He introduced us to Brooke, and we took a couple of pictures because you know I had to have a picture of that.
Then I babbled tried explaining how I was validating my 14 year old inner girl by finally meeting with him and he seemed a little confused by the whole teenage reference and I remembered that usually only my husband can decipher my train of thought when I really get going, so I just thought screw the explaining, how many times am I going to be standing and joking with Billy Fucking Wirth?! (I’m not sure if that’s his full name) – So, I just did it…
Oh yeah, I did. He was such a good sport.
After the kiss, I had been fulfilled, and went with my husband to get a drink at the bar. I smacked him in the chest a couple of times and asked him why he didn’t tell me that Billy Wirth was behind me when we got there. He reminded me of all of the off the wall things I’ve babbled to celebrities when I’ve had time to prepare and thought it was better if I was surprised. I had to concede, that is usually what happens.
10 minutes later, drinks in hand, discussing our future evening plans (it was also date night) Billy walks up to us and we all start chatting again. I took the moment to really look at the situation, to feel it. It was great. We talked about our kids (hey, he asked!) his girlfriend – who he thinks is “the one” and you can tell he meant it. He told us about his mom in New York, his art, he asked how we met and about each of the kids again. We talked about so much, like standing there talking with us was just something that happens. Yes, to normal people but this was Billy F Wirth!! I had to collect myself every once in awhile. He was so amazingly nice and down to earth. He was….. normal. We actually talked a lot of the time we were there. HE asked for MY card. It was insanity I tell you. It was time to continue the date with Dave, so I walked over to say good bye. Brooke was surprised we were leaving early and he said he’d call me. (I am so not holding my breath for that, but it was still nice to hear). Billy joked that I was going on a date with my husband but he was the foreplay. It was like hanging out with people we’d known forever. It was crazy. Crazy in a normal way.
And the moral of the story is….. I kissed BILLY WIRTH. Amen.